I am so ready for summer. Give me the warm weather, the tan, the cookouts and the fireworks. Bring on the flip flops and the thunderstorms. Bring on the best friends and the unforgettable moments. I'm ready for summer...

Proverbs 3:5

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understandings, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path."

I learned this verse eons ago when I was really young in Sparkies. Then I learned it again in Chums. Then I learned it again in jr high Bible classes, and Sunday school classes, and basically every other form of Bible teaching or church related card/encouraging note. Over all those years, I kind of just brushed it off because I knew what the verse said and I knew what the verse meant...yet as stupid as it sounds I didn't realize how applicable it was to life, especially my own. I'm not going to lie, I have trust issues. I have issues not being in control and letting someone else be the one to take the reigns. Naturally everyone would assume that I'm a leader...well you're wrong. For the most part, I'll let someone else lead the large group, I'm more of a blend into the background follower; atleast when it comes to academic groups and assignments. I do, however, like to be in control. I like to control what I'm feeling and I like to control what happens in my life but I've completely realized that sometimes things happen that as much as you'd like to control them...you can't. God is the only controller of everything. I feel like a horrible Christian by saying I have a hard time trusting God, but as I've proved yet again...when I try to control my life I make a mess of it. I make a mess of my emotions. I make a mess of my future. I myself become a mess. Now that I've made the realization, the next step is to really try. I know I have a huge problem with it. I have a huge problem with many things. I'm trying though. I'm trying to change. I'm not content with "just being the way I've always been" I was born with a sinful nature. If you knew me in jr high you would've thought I was the spawn of Satan...but I'm not happy with just being the way I am. I need to change. I have many things I need to tackle and I'm not looking forward to the inevitable tears along the way, but it needs to happen. I need to change. This is going to have to be my me and God time. I'm eager to see how God works in me, and I'm excited to be changed. I'm not naive though, it's going to be rough and I'm going to feel really low, but thats what I need.

"God always works with people where they are, doing for them what they need most"